Intecessors of the Lamb

I'm going to run through a few of what I call attributes of the Holy Spirit because they are so obvious in our lives and are needed in our lives as leaders. The main attribute of the Holy Spirit is that He is pure light. Without that light, we don't have the discernment. How can we lead if we don't know where we are going? How can we lead if we are stumbling in the dark ourselves? John tells us that we are children of the light (Jn 12:36). God doesn't want us to stumble in the dark, but He wants us to have light, to be empowered. Jesus said, "Wait until you are clothed with this power from on High" (see Lk 24:49). In other words, wait until you have this light, this tremendous gift of discernment.

The Holy Spirit is very much a prophetic Spirit as well. One time the Lord showed me that in the Old Testament times the people put great emphasis on the prophets who were chosen and picked by God to be their seers. These were the men who could see what God was doing or what He wanted to do or what God didn't want His people to do. They called them "seers," and they listened carefully to these seers. The Lord let me understand that we have a "seer" in our midst when we have the Holy Spirit. He sees. He knows the deep things of God. Like the people of the Old Testament, we also learn to listen very carefully to this prophetic voice within us, to this Seer whom God has given to us in the Person of the Holy Spirit.

He is the Sanctifier. He daily cleanses us of our sins, our failings, and all the things that are keeping us from really soaring to the heights. He heals us. He can recall a memory and heal it in a second. He can recall a memory of tremendous joy and bring us new hope. He can pull up anything from within us if we're listening and expecting it. He is a Healer.

Jesus said that the Spirit is an announcer. "He will announce to you the things to come" (Jn 16:13). We're living in a time in the Church where God is speaking to us of new things more than ever. He is speaking of new things that we haven't seen. The Holy Spirit announces these new things to us.

The Holy Spirit is an Advocate. This is so important-He is our own special public defender. Jesus said, "Do not worry beforehand about what to say. In that hour, say what you are inspired to say. It will not be yourselves speaking but the Holy Spirit" (Mk 13:11). The Spirit of My Father will be speaking through you. Isn't that wonderful? It's not easy to find a good attorney today, is it? But we have One right within us.

The Holy Spirit is a Revealer. He loves to reveal hidden things, and He especially loves to reveal Jesus. He helped us to recognize Jesus within ourselves and within others and within events and circumstances. He helps us to recognize Jesus in all kinds of things all day long. He helps us to recognize God.

The Holy Spirit definitely is a Leader. He's the One who led Jesus, and He is the One who is assigned to lead us as well.

The Holy Spirit is the Promise of the Father. He is a tremendous Promise. This Promise deepens our faith in the promises of the Father. It deepens our hope . St. Paul said that the Holy Spirit is the down-payment of all that is yet waiting.. This is a tremendous down-payment that He has given to us through His presence, gifts, blessings, and fruits. If He is just a down-payment, it makes you wonder what the rest is like!

The Holy Spirit is a wonderful Counselor. He is the perfect Counselor. One time when I was praying about this it struck me in such awesomeness that nobody counsels the Holy Spirit. Our tendency is to say, "Where did you learn that?" or "Where did you hear that?" or "Who said that to you?" We are always learning something from someone. The Holy Spirit is His own Counselor, and we have direct access to this Divine Counselor.

The Holy Spirit is the One who makes us into witnesses. He Himself brings us into conformity with Jesus, so we begin to look like Jesus and talk like Jesus and act like Jesus, so people can see Jesus in us. This is how He is calling all of us as leaders to witness to Jesus within us. We sing a song a lot, "Oh . . . heaven is in my heart." I just love that song. Heaven is in our hearts. It's beautiful!

The final dimension that I want to share about the Holy Spirit is His joy. That is the fruit. The Church and its saints tell us that joy is the infallible sign of the presence of God. Whenever we see and experience that joy, we know that we are in the presence of God, and He's within you.

I just want to share an image that was given this morning. The Holy Spirit was circling and dipping His wings and coming in very close. He was winking as He kind of flew by. The wink was like, "I know something you don't know, and it's really good." That's the look. He said, "Tell them I'm coming in for a landing."

Excerpt from "Baptism in the Holy Spirit," Pillars Album, Omaha, NE, 2001

10-27-03 Avarice Part One: Attachments

October 27, 2003

"Avarice, Part I: Attachments"

This particular sin will strike against two of the Commandments. The first one being, "I am the Lord, your God, and you shall not have strange gods before me." In other words, "You're not going to have any idols. You're not going to have anything before Me, including yourself." And so this sin sets itself up before God because it doesn't make God its treasure. It in itself becomes a treasure. It serves itself. And so a man or a woman who is living out of this particular sin will really sacrifice everything to it. They will sacrifice time, family, and strength, and the danger is that they may sacrifice eternity. This is how powerful this sin. We can't serve God and money.

This sin also strikes at the Tenth Commandment, "You shall not covet your neighbor's goods." The Tenth Commandment is actually showing us that greed is not acceptable. It is not. It absolutely forbids avarice. It forbids greed and a passion for riches. It's not only that we have something. Maybe we don't have something, but it's if we want it or if that's where we're focused because that desire will motivate us tremendously. It will take us in one direction or the other. A desire for riches and for the things of this world will lead us right into Satan's camp.

A little more description of what this sin looks like. It's very possessive. It clings. It's like an octopus. We can let go of one thing, but we have a lot of other ways to grasp onto. Oftentimes God is showing us one area and telling us, "Let it go, let it go. You're hanging on, you're clinging." We might let go but then cling to all the other things. It's very difficult to let go of everything. It takes that power of the Cross. It takes His love power to do that. So greed is very much like an octopus. It's very selfish.

Several years ago I asked my sister-in-law, who is not Catholic, "What do you think is the number one problem in our world?" I was amazed at her answer. In fact, there was a lot of wisdom in her answer. Instantly, without batting an eyelash, she said, "Selfishness." That is definitely greed - very, very selfish. It wants everything for itself. It's very possessive. It's harmful because it will possess us-it will possess us rather than letting God possess us. Scripture tells us, "What would it profit a man if he gained the whole world and suffered the loss of his eternal soul?" (see Mt 16:26) It's something to really think about. What would it profit us if we had everything but suffered the loss of eternity with God?

Where does this sin of greed show up in my life? This will vary for each of us. I'm just giving a few guidelines to help spot it. It might show up as materialism and a tendency to acquire earthly goods. We have become so accustomed to that way of life. We live in it. We live in the world, but there is the challenge is to be in the world but not of it and to not to let these things possess us. One of the ways it can show up is to constantly desire what I don't have. That alone is going to take me away from God. It's not going to sever me from God, but it will cloud and mar the relationship.

There was a beautiful older sister in the cloister, and I'll never forget one of the things she said. We were talking about what we had left behind when we entered the cloister. Most of us were talking about it with great joy because we had received so much more in the cloister. But she had a sadness about what she had left behind. It wasn't even something she actually ever had, but there was something she had always desired, and she carried that desire with her all throughout her religious life. This is what we're talking about. What she had always desired was a fur coat. A fur coat! You never know, do you, what is going to be that attachment that just drives us. I remember saying to the Lord, "Oh God, it's just a shame that she never got an extra job to buy that coat so that she could have walked away from it. She has clung to this desire all these years." She probably wouldn't have liked it anyway had she gotten it, and she probably would have been very happy to have given it to the Lord, but she couldn't walk away from that desire.

And so this sin will attach itself to us very strongly, not only through what we have but also through what we don't have yet desire. Our attitude about it can get very immature because when we want to possess something our favorite words are, "It's mine." One time we saw a video about the stages of human development, and I remember that the two-year olds' favorite words are, "It's mine. It's mine."

We need to trust God. We need to trust that He will do everything necessary to purify us. We don't have to think up a lot of penance. That independence that I should do this and I've got to do that is more the adult way. It's the way of avarice to be more independent, even in the things that we're going to do for the Lord. We wait for the light of the Holy Spirit and learn to accept what God puts in our lives each day. One of the greatest purification and penance is to accept the people in our lives.

Greed can show up when we feel we have to be the first to know something. Have you ever had that tendency? Somebody releases a little bit of news information and you have a twinge, "How come I didn't know that first?" That having to be the first to know something is very much an offshoot of this sin. We want that information first for ourselves.

How does it show up in our spiritual lives? It's everywhere, of course. It shows up as attachment to religious practices, devotions, and possessions. We may be attached to these things and not want to share them with anyone. We don't want to let them go. We may be more attached to them than what they represent-the Lord. This can happen.

I used to have a very dear friend, she's not living now, but she was like a second mother to me after I became a Catholic. Her bedroom was absolutely cluttered with every kind of religious thing imaginable. Statues all over the place. It looked like a church goods store, which is great if you have a church goods store. But I just couldn't believe all the religious things. There was a priest in town for the summer, and he knew her quite well. I was asking him about it. I said, "What is it? There's something strange. I just had a strange feeling that something was wrong when I went into her bedroom and saw all those beautiful things. But it was so much." He said, "That's what you'll find in beginners in the religious life. They want this and they want this. It's a spiritual immaturity. As she grows more into the Lord and becomes accustomed to His riches, she'll start to let these things go." He said, "Just watch. They will start to bother her. Give her about six months and then look at her bedroom again." And that's exactly what happened. One by one, certain things started to disappear. They were bothering her. They were too busy. She wanted more of the simplicity. We could tell she was getting closer to God now and her room reflected that very much. She was really getting close now to the Gift Himself, and so she could let some of these things go. In fact, they were bothering her.

Greed will show up in attachment to religious practices that maybe God is saying, "I love it when you do that, but not if you're putting it first before other obligations, duties, people, or even first before listening to Me." When I was in the cloister, we had to say the rosary. That's beautiful and the sisters were happy to pray the rosary, but when the rule changed and we had the freedom to say the rosary or not to say the rosary, we loved it. Now we could pray the rosary in the more contemplative way the Lord was leading us. It set us free to listen to God. Contemplatives want to listen to God. (Teaching on avarice will continue next week.)

Excerpt from Mother Nadine's Prayer Warrior Summit: The Lifestyle of Prayer Warriors," tape 8, August 2002.

05-05-03 Discernment Part One

May 5, 2003

"Discernment: First Week, Part I"

Ignatius divides discernment into the First and Second Weeks of the Exercises because they are different. Satan works differently when we're in the sin area. In the First Week, our concern in discernment is mostly with desolation because we're dealing mostly with sin. In other words, we're focusing on self-knowledge. We're focusing on our own sinful human condition before God. We're focusing on ongoing conversion. Every time we make a retreat, every time we make the Exercises, we're always at a different level of turning towards God.

Consolation will encourage us in this journey toward God. It will help to keep us focused. It will give us hope that we're on the right track. We're going to make it. God uses consolation mostly to bring us toward Him. He uses consolation to encourage us, to help us feel confident that He's with us, and together we're going to make it.

Desolation will call even our basic commitment to God into question. It will bring discouragement. It can bring a hopelessness. It can bring feelings of, "Oh, what's the use? Nothing's going to change." Desolation will bring disturbances. We can get very anxious. We can wonder if we're really on the right track. We can wonder and question, "Does God really love me? Did God really say that?" We can see the affect desolation will start to have on our relationship with God. All the focus will get on the struggle and totally off of God. Ignatius says if we're in serious sin, Satan will console us. So we can't always say, "Oh gee, I'm in the consolations of God" because it might be Satan consoling us. We have to look and see where we are.

If we are in serious sin and are receiving consolation, it is from Satan. Satan wants us to be consoled to keep us orientated in the sin and keep us going that way. In this particular case, Ignatius said that God will use desolation so we'll hate where we are. We'll want to get out of it. "Prayer is terrible. Nothing is happening. My whole life is falling apart." God will permit that desolation to come and will use it to help us. Other than this situation, God usually uses consolation, and Satan uses desolation. But it depends whether or not we're in serious sin.

Most of us making this retreat are starting from some level of goodness, but we want to go into something better. We want to become more perfect. And so in that case, when we're trying to go from point A to point B, from being good to becoming better, Satan will definitely use desolation to disturb us. He'll try to fill us with fears, "You don't know what you're doing. This is the unknown. Suppose God doesn't come through for you?" We've all been there, with constant doubts to make us hesitate and waiver, to make us not move at all, or to make us not change at all. Satan will come in heavy with desolation when we're trying to move into the more perfect, when we're trying to choose the better part, but God will come forth with tremendous consolations to encourage us. We're always seeking to grow. And so we've got these two particular strong feelings of consolation and desolation. One is from God, the other from Satan.

Excerpt from Mother Nadine's "Heart-to-heart Listening: New Heart," 2000.

05-06-02 Ask the Father for His Mercy Upon You

May 6, 2002

"The Pillar of Fire"

Our Holy Father had a very interesting intention for June of this year 2001. He gives an intention for the first Fridays of every month, and in June his intention was to make Jesus, present in the Eucharist, the beginning and the end of all that we do. This is what sacrament is-to make Jesus present in our lives in all that we do and all that we are.

Pope John Paul II has said that the Eucharist is a sacrament, and he broke it down into three parts. He said the Eucharist is a sacrament of sacrifice. Intercessors certainly are sacraments of sacrifice as you well know. The Holy Father said that the Eucharist is a sacrament of communion. Intercessors are sacraments of communion. This comes out of our contemplative union with the Lord. He said that the Eucharist is a sacrament of presence. Remember how Francis of Assisi would walk around carrying the presence of God? So does our Holy Father. Those of you who have seen him know what I mean. When we saw him, we were totally unprepared for the presence of God in the man. It's overwhelming! We just cried out of joy throughout the whole Mass. This is what the Holy Father is talking about. This is what being a sacrament of His presence means.

I want to conclude with a story. One night we had a priest as a guest for dinner. He had visited Lanciano, Italy, and was telling us about the tremendous miracle that took place there in 700 AD. I guess the priest at that time was having a doubt believing in the real presence of Jesus in the sacrament, and so the Lord manifested His real flesh and His real blood. They could see it-it was just a tremendous miracle! Now that was in 700 AD, and it still is happening. Isn't that amazing? The flesh and blood became visible in the host and the wine, and the fruit of it (we can always tell by the fruit if it's authentic or not) was tremendous repentance and conversion.

Can you imagine when we are in such a deep union with the Eucharistic Jesus that just by our presence we can call a Church to repentance and conversion, just like the Holy Father can do it. We just see the man, and we want to change. He has Jesus and we know it.

What was also interesting about the miracle of Lanciano was in 1970 with modern technology they did some scientific research. They discovered that the host itself is part of the heart muscle. Isn't that amazing? When I heard that, I almost went into ecstasy at the dinner table that night! The heart muscle! I said, "Wouldn't you know that God would leave His heart with us in this Sacrament." He left His heart-pure Love. So the Eucharist is truly pure Love. It is God. It's His heart. He has given Eucharist to us. He lives within us, with this beating heart that beats for souls, that is thirsting for souls, and that is pulsating with tremendous love for the entire world.

So He is calling us to be the pillar with Him, the Lamb. There is only one Pillar, and it is Jesus. What has surfaced so much about the Pillar throughout this week is the element of fire-that Fire who purifies and consumes us without destroying us, that burning fire of His love that burns within. Jesus said, "I have come to cast fire" (see Lk 12:49). He is casting fire now through all of us who allow His heart to burn within us and let it go out to the world. He is still within us, that Pillar of Fire, by night because there is more darkness today than ever before. We have to be a pillar of fire, with, in, and through Jesus, to guide the people through the desert with this beautiful gift of God's love, His Fire.

I want to share part of a prophetic word because it sums up what He's been sharing with us. He said, "There are dark days coming. In fact, they are already here, and there will be many attacks of the evil one against you and against My Kingdom, and you will walk in darkness. But the darkness will not deter you from the path. The darkness will not overtake you. You are coated in the Blood of the Lamb. You are covered in the greatest of all treasures-Me. And as you walk, even through the dark times, the glow from within you will light your path, and it will light the path for many others. Go in peace and be in peace. My Spirit is within you and my Kingdom will have no end." Amen.

Excerpt from "Charism: Transforming Union," Pillars Album, Omaha, NE, 2001

May 13, 2002

04-28-03 Too Little Have I Loved Thee

April 28, 2003

"Too Little Have I Loved Thee"

Some people find it very difficult to see themselves as sinful, especially if they see sin in the light of law. But if we see sin in the light of the new commandment, the law of love, then we'll always see where we fall short because love will always show us that. Ignatius says if our sense of sin is not very deep, it's because our sense of love is not very deep either. The more we love, the more sensitive we are to the feelings of other people. To not give a birthday card or remember an anniversary in itself isn't sinful, but to forget a wife's anniversary or a good friend's birthday can hurt. Why? Because we love that person and that person loves us. The deeper the love, the deeper the sin can go, and the more fine-tuning God does with us so we do not violate His law of love.

Ignatius says a servant can be complacent because he knows his obligations. "These are the rules. This is what I expect from you if you're going to be my servant." But in friendship, there aren't these kind of laws. Friendship and love go beyond the law. Ignatius says a friend can never be complacent because the limits of friendship are totally open-ended. In other words, there are absolutely no limits to the love of friends. The deeper the friendship, the more wide-open the love is. It's endless.

There are many saints who considered themselves the greatest of sinners. One of them that we're more familiar with is Teresa of Avila. We hear this in her writings, "I am the greatest of sinners." I used to wonder, "How can these saints say this?" They all say, "Oh God have mercy on me. I'm the greatest of all sinners." The reason is because of their love. Teresa knew that many people were doing things worse than she was. We can look around and see other people doing a lot worse things than what we're doing. We can justify our actions, "Oh, I'm not so bad. I'm not like them." It sounds like the Pharisees and the publican - "I'm not like them."

But Teresa and the other saints realized they were sinners because they had been loved so much. They saw God's love. They saw His gift. They saw all the things that God did for them, the graces, the blessings, and so in that light they saw how little they could respond to His love. This is what made them think they were the greatest sinner because the more they experienced being loved, the more they were aware of their inability to return that love.

We all fall short. None of us can return love to God in the way He loves us. That's where our sin is. This is why the Holy Spirit, the great gift of Love, is always trying to bring us into a deeper sensitivity to returning that love. Love for love. "What return shall I make unto the Lord? (see Mt 16:26) How much can I love Him today? How much can I love my friends today? How much can I love His people today? How much can I love my enemies today?" Everything is based on love, and in the end of our lives, that is the only thing we'll be judged on-how much we loved or how little we loved.

So we'll find that with the friends of God, particularly the saints, oftentimes there is a sadness because they knew they fell short of the mark. St. Augustine said, "Too late have I known Thee, too little have I loved Thee." I think that's how we will always feel-"I wish I could love God more. I wish I could do more. I wish I had that deeper freedom. I wish I could . . . ." Wish, wish, wish. Well, this is what God wishes, too.

Excerpt from Mother Nadine's "Heart-to-heart Listening: New Heart," 2000.

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